Taylor Neilly, LCSW
Email: taylor@gowithintherapy.com
Phone:
904-501-5134
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you.
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- Maya Angelou
My Approach
In my therapeutic approach I focus on understanding how early life experiences, caregiver and peer relationships, and challenging life circumstances impact the way we view ourselves and the world. I work with individuals, couples, families, adults, and adolescents who are encountering hardship, in need of help, and seeking healing and positive change in their life. .
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An individual’s yearning for change might be provoked by past or recent traumatic occurrences, feeling trapped or overwhelmed by distressing emotions, or by experiencing conflicts in relationships. Or maybe you are feeling challenged in your life and simply need someone to talk to and support you, to help you make sense of your feelings. No matter how acute or ordinary, internal and external friction can lead to a myriad of symptoms, such as stress, anxiety, fear, depression, anger, mood dysregulation, or difficulty finding direction or purpose in life. I am here for all of it!
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Because the neural architecture of the brain and nervous system is largely constructed in childhood, the parts of our personality and many of the ways we view, interact, and respond to the world, are informed by early life experiences. Our mind and body are primed to protect us from threats and keep us safe in relation to what we’ve been through. As we grow older and as we continue to be challenged by suffering, we often confuse opportunity for connection as something that can hurt us. Unfortunately, our avoidance often keeps us from connecting to ourselves, the people we love, and the life we want to live.
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The goal of my therapeutic approach is to resolve attachment and relational wounds, so that clients can experience liberation in themselves, their relationships, and their roles in life. I utilize a trauma-focused, attachment-based perspective, as well as psychodynamic techniques and the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model to explore how fearful experiences, pain, and hardship inform parts of our personality. These challenging experiences often cause individuals to feel trapped in habits, conflicting internal and external judgment, and an inner experience of shame.
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In therapeutic partnership, I support, guide, and educate clients on how they can work with the different parts of themselves in healthier ways. I teach mindfulness, breathing, and relaxation techniques that support the process of becoming more centered, or accessing the Self from an IFS or parts perspective. In time, clients cultivate an ability to self-regulate and calm themselves, while developing more curiosity, understanding, and awareness, leading to more self-compassion, emotional freedom and empowering life choices. The centered Self is more alive, connected, and spiritually fit to bring light into the world and work with, instead of against, the hardships of life.
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The beauty of therapy and my practice is that it works because we do it together in partnership. Together, we build resilience and self-compassion, to believe in ourselves, so that we can work toward valuing and caring for what is most important to us with renewed love and appreciation. It takes support to navigate through and allow the diverse experiences of life and relationships to unfold, to accept the joys and the hardships, the happiness and the grief, the confidence and the questioning. I believe that these experiences, as conflicting and painful as they feel at times, are not opposed or irreconcilable. The truth is that the vast spectrum of our life offers opportunities for awareness, acceptance, and love in each and every moment. The process of awakening to this truth begins with accepting the help of someone we can trust to guide us in going Within.
Traumas are not experienced as events in life, but as life defining.
- Christopher Bollas
Research suggests that trauma is prevalent in our society, and its effect on individuals is unique and relative to a person's lived experience. The causes of trauma are vast and varying, and I utilize evidence-based techniques in guiding clients to recognize trauma and its impact in their life. Trauma can be caused by shocking occurrences that leave an individual terrified and trapped in a fight, flight, or freeze state, or it can be caused by limiting self beliefs imposed by a caretaker or dysfunctional family system. Whatever the causes, we will work together in creating a sense of safety and self-validation, while developing coping skills, emotional regulation techniques, and mindfulness that help you feel more safe in exploring and resolving these issues.